falling too quickly.. - Love and Romance

[Deleted Member]

I have this problem of falling too quickly for girls, as I'm sure some of you do. I guess its because its so hard for me to meet girls that like other girls near me. I've always been a believer in making the most of an opportunity too. I've tried not to fall so hard and fast but I still do.. I suppose learning and experience are the keys but right now I have little to no patience left in me. I don't know what to do, help?!

[Teri_Baker]

I think you are the just like the rest of us and the reason there is the joke about what does a lesbian take on her first date? toothbrush. What does she take on the second date? U-haul. Lol We sort of get swept up with our emotions. But try to see where you the two of you do fit together. That is very important, and comunicatiive, goals in life and in relationship, and even where you want to live.Are they into drama? ***? You have to find all these things out and if you can live with them or not. It takes time and you need some patience.But i hoped you got a laugh at the joke.You do find out so many things when you move in with someone and then it can get ugly when its not right. Good luck.

[Ju****]

@teri. It is a standing joke between my partner and I, though she and I are not typical lesbian couple, the way I moved in certainly was a classic lesbian move in.

We fell in love so fast and moved on it so fast.... And still going strong after two years.

[Teri_Baker]

Congratulations. I am glad its going well for you two. I also have to chuckle because it hit you two like that too. I had one relationship where she wanted to take it slow, we just kept meeting at places to kiss and and get the car all steamed up. it drove me nuts.But then when she finally gave herself to me I had to love her so many times. She drove me crazy with desire.. Any way, glad you two are doing great. and hugs to you..

[Bobbye_L._Webb]

Women are emotional creatures, it simply can't be helped, but don't lose hope. I find myself in that position myself. I've been dating this girl for a month now and my usual instinct is to run like hell for *** of falling in love, but I can't run forever and hell it might be a nice change. The point is, don't be afraid hon, life is a risk and love is a risk, but if we never take risks in life we risk losing the opportunity that love and life can bring to our hearts and our lives. Does that make sense? Good luck hon.

[Ro****]

I do the exact same thing as you, rush to fast into relationships. But I also have an issue of being the other end of the spectrum as well. I don't really -what's the word? commit myself to relationships or even dating. I don't put the effort in so the relationship fizzles out quickly without it going nowhere. Anyone else have this issue?

[Teri_Baker]

So the two of you don't feel the need to get connected with anyone? Is it like you don't want to have to be connected with anyone? or is some phobia?or Just like being a lone wolf? I hope you tell those you go out with that you have like to live your life solo. I think it would be fair to them to know their is no future with the two of you.. I think we like to go out to meet someone to connect with and to know that the other person feels that same way. But then, I feel you should communicate after a few dates, when their seems to be some connections between the two of us, that we should talk about where we feel we are going.. We all get caught up in each other, we forget to mention what we want out of the relationship or if we do want a relationship.It is so much easier to talk about it up front then to lead someone on. and have them feel cheated.. Tell them so they know what to expect. Do you really want that to happen though? If not, maybe you should seek some counseling to find out why you are not connecting with anyone. Hugs.

[Bobbye_L._Webb]

Teri,

I'm not sure, at least on my part what my deal is, but I did tell my current gf about my commitment issues of the past and we've discussed it at length. I really care for her more then I believe I've ever cared before, which is frightening in and of itself, but I am giving this one a fair chance, no more running. After all one should not dispense advice they are not gonna take right? You are right, it is only fair to let people know the deal up front. Hugs back to you.