Lonely - Love and Romance

[Br****]

I just came out of two really long relationships that were horrible and now that I've started dating again I still seem to be getting hurt and let down. I try not to jump into things too fast but I'm so ready to share my life with that one girl that completes me and I'm scared that may be my downfall.

[Matty_Estrada-Cain]

It usually happens when you are no longer looking for it. Most people end up settling because they don't want to be alone. It the end that is so much worse because you have break up after break up, or you end up in a relationship that you can't seem to break away from. People don't seem to understand the concept of slow and steady anymore, they just jump in with both feet, all the while ignoring the signs around them. My advice is to stop looking. Take a break and get in touch with yourself. Learn about what you really want in a partner, what you will accept/wont accept and what you will compromise on. People have a way of surprising you, and love even more so.

[Br****]

I just want someone to treat me good and make me happy

[Matty_Estrada-Cain]

That is what most people want. Well most sane people anyway. No one can "make" you happy. You have to make yourself happy before you can allow someone else to share that with you. But I understand what you mean. I still stick by my earlier post though. Sit down and make a list. It really does help. In college I took a relation dynamics course and I learned that one of the major aspects of any relationship, is knowing yourself first. We all had to evaluate ourselves, and don't lie, that only hurts you in the end. Anyways you evaluate your wants and needs, then compare them to what others have given you in relationships. Find what was lacking in those relationships. I really does help. Well most people, the ones who actually honestly try it. There are more steps, and I would be more than willing to share them with you. Good luck either way!!

[Pa****]

Hello lonely. Sorry you are having go through this but it's a process of life but it get better. I don't know you so gonna just speak in general terms if you really want find a healthy relationship you must first get yourself healthy . By this I'm saying take some time off learn to date yourself to go out have nice time with no pressure this allows you time to think weigh your options but most of all you will start see that that you have change you or you will continue to get same of mess so clean house and get you healthy be ok being with yourself first this will slow down your rush of needing someone thus settling for anyone good luck God bless

[Deleted Member]

Good advice, Matty